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If you'd only cared about style, I'msure you would have made the right impression." I should be judged on my work product, not my tits," she said. Ilooked at her tits. Wonderful tits. I wished mine were as big as hersand not so small.I shook my head. What the hell?"Drink up," she said. I drank.Things began to clear. I could see the sign clearly now. It wasn'tsome weird language. It was plain as day. Palace of Great Beauty NailSalon, it read. That was strange. I took another sip and put the mug down. I felt fuzzy, but my head wasno longer pounding. I looked up into Pamela's eyes. They were hard.Suddenly she reached out and grabbed my throat and squeezed. I coughedand struggled and choked and she let go.I spat out. "Wha you do that fowah?" I coughed again. "Wha happen tomayee voice?" Wha you do?" Pamela laughed."Why you laugh? This not funny. I sound like speak no Engrish. Ispeak Engrish. I no have accent? Why this happen?" No matter how Itried, my voice. "David grinned.Bachelor Officers' Quarters, 08:28"Ouch! Damn it"Some other day, I might have taken myself to task for muttering a curse aloud over a little shaving cut. Strange, I suppose, given the reputation for "swearing like a sailor" that all members of the Navy have. But Mama Willow insisted that all her children learn to express themselves without resort to mere profanity. "If you want to make your strong emotions and intense feelings understood under stressful conditions, learn to master the language arts. A well formed sarcastic remark, or a timely rhetorical question, delivered in a quiet tone can be far more effective than swearing."She was wonderful.She followed her own precept. Mama Willow could tan your hide with words alone, and leave you stinging without ever raising her voice once, or allowing a single obscenity to touch her lips. Except of course when she said, "Follow these rules, and you will be known as a person who can keep their head in a crisis, remain rational.
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