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"Present – Ben – In the woodsDamn I know I read about a fucking bear like this before, now where the hell was it and what the hell were the details? I swear sometimes I can't remember shit. Stacy says the bear needs something, so I turn and see he's at attention again. I look at him and order, "Fall out." The bear sits down I notice his collar and tell Stacy, "I'm going to look at the tag on his collar."Stacy worries, "Ben are you sure you want to get that close to him?"I wisecrack, "He's safer than most women I know."She complains, "I sure hope you aren't including me in that group."I don't answer but think to myself that she's number two in the group. I walk up to the bear and say, "I'm just going to look at your collar."I reach down, look at the tag and it says, 'Wojtek III Iranian Brown Bear.'Then I remember and announce, "Stacy this is Wojtek III he must be the grandson of the original Wojtek."Stacy asks, "Who or what is a Wojtek? Is that some sort of Russian satellite?"I chuckle. Sighing, you find yourself questioning your friendship with these people again, and begin to wander around aimlessly. Subconsciously, you find yourself scanning the crowd, looking for a corner or a couch or something you can just sit and not be bothered. Preferably with a cat, that way you'll have someone intelligent to talk to. But the more you wander, the more you come up empty. Sighing again, you decide it might be worth a shot to actually try and enjoy yourself for once.You wander into the kitchen, and find the customary cluster of shitty beer laying around. You find one that seems undamaged, and crack it open. If you're going to have a good time, you need to start somewhere, you think to yourself. And a beer is as good a place as any. You cringe, however, when the smell of it hits your nose. And again as you take the first sip. Literally shaking it off, you take a longer swig, and then turn around to leave. The kitchen is far to crowded to do much of anything, and that's not fun.
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