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”The waitress simply said, “Sir, this is Texas. Every thing is bigger.” So when the waitress brought the steak the farmer said, “Excuse me, I ordered a steak not the whole cow!” Again the waitress said, “This is Texas every thing is bigger.” After he finished he had to go to the bathroom so he asked the waitress were it was. She told him it was down the hall first door to the left. Just as he walked through the men’s room door he fell into a deep pool and screamed, “HELP, HELP! DON’T FLUSH!”Q: What do you call a guy from West Virginia who doesn’t have sisters?A: A virgin.What’s the state flower of West Virginia?A satellite dish.A traveling salesman is in West Virginia when he comes upon a house with a little boy sitting on the front steps.“Son, is your mother home?” The little boy nods yes.“Can I see her please?” The boy nods again, and they go around to the back of the house where they find the mother on the ground, humping away with a sheep.“Son, do you see what your mother is. I told her the whole story, since she’d been one of the early victims of the smear campaign, she was only too happy to help out.”As we left the restaurant it was about nine-thirty. Mike looked around and saw the marquee for a movie theater. “Say, have you guys seen the new Matt Damon movie. I hear it’s really good ... Oh, and we wouldn’t want to get home too early would we?”“Oh, not at all, and I’d love to go to the movies,” I replied.We didn’t get out of the theater until twelve-thirty, and didn’t pull our cars into Dillon Run Townhouse Complex until one in the morning. The temperatures were still below freezing at night, and no one was around. By agreement we’d killed our headlights as we pulled in, went into our garages, and immediately shut our doors.Sheila and I tiptoed around in the dark and went to bed.At two o’clock in the morning, there was a pounding on our front door. I peeked out through the upstairs’ blinds and saw Leslie banging on the door. She was alone.I turned to.
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