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Do you mind if I ask you a personal question?”“You can ask. But I don’t give any guarantees on an answer.”“Fair enough. Are you in love with that girl?”“What girl?” I said, looking around.“No, you dumb ass. That girl you were staring at in chemistry.”“Oh. No. I don’t even know her.”“Really? That’s good.”“Why is that good?”“Because I think you’re cute and I don’t like competition.”“Shit. You’re direct, aren’t you?”“Always have been, always will. And since we’re being direct, you should know I don’t plan to have sex until I’m married. So with that said, do you want to go out sometime?”With a smile, I said, “Sure.”“Good,” she said, popping the last french fry in her mouth and then wiped her hands and lips with her napkin. “How about tonight at seven. Meet me in Goods lobby, and don’t be late.”And with that, she picked up her empty tray and left without looking back. She had eaten three times the amount I had bought, and I still had half my hamburger left. I sat there trying to figure. ” “What colour are you going to wear tonight? “She asks wearily. “Gold of course, “says the man proudly. The wife gives him a withering look and says: “What about silver? It’d be nice if you tried coming second for a change.”A sausage factory owner was showing his arrogant son around and try as he might he found it impossible to impress him. As they approached the heart of the factory, the man thought: “If this doesn’t do it nothing will!” He showed his son a machine and said: “Son, this machine is the very the heart of the factory. We put in a pig and outcomes sausages.” Still unimpressed his son merely replied: “Yes, but do you have a machine where you feed in sausages and produce a pig.” The furious father thought and said, “Yes son, we call it your mother.”A young swimmer from the Australian Olympic team sneaks his new girlfriend, a gorgeous American gymnast, into his room at the Olympic Village. Once she’s inside, he quickly switches out all the lights, they rapidly disrobe and.
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