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Every morning we'd be just feet away from each other as we took off our clothes to get dressed. Then there was the issue of masturbation. I'd just turned sixteen when I discovered how good I could make myself feel. I preferred using my clit rather than fingering myself. Although, sometimes I was in a mood where I just needed something in me. I don't know when Jack first started but I caught him doing it a lot and he caught me a lot. Neither of us freaked out over it. If I walked in on him jacking it i'd just apologize and leave the room. He did the same if he walked in on me rubbing my clit. We understood each other. We knew we were both pretty horny teenagers who'd sometimes need to relieve themselves. We never went as far as to do it in front of each other. Although we were more comfortable with each other than most siblings, we knew there was a line somewhere. Little did we know that the line would soon be crossed. Mom had a week off work coming up and told us we'd be going to. Lastly, the song "Fernando"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQsjAbZDx-4is a song when I first heard it when it came, I had some understandingas my grandfather was in WWI and had effects; yet, kept quiet. The onlything he would say to me is "I hope you never have to go through a warand especially a world war." Also, when I used to watch movies like"Battle of the Buldge" and "Where Eagles Dare" my grandfather would askme to understand that movies glorify war and make it tidy, all soldierscome back OK on the good side. I know from the first gulf what mygrandfather means and what does mean to understand PTSD and what I wentthrough in 2017 started a second PTSD through shelter / religious abuseI am living with and using the techniques to avoid too many down days,it still means with many morning events I can't make even to a Sundaycoffee at church because I wake up later.The song "Fernando" I see is about a woman who loves her partner andreleases the partner is living with PTSD triggered by.
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