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The itch will eventually pass, and you’ll remain hollow. I miss Her, to be quite frank. I yearn for Her gentle and persuasive power that would often flow through me, sometimes a soft and thick glow of clover honey, and other times a river of fire that burned me at all hours. I miss the nights I could not sleep for the words that made me tremble, that weakened me for all their strength. Her most tender whispers that stirred me from dreams, filled me with ideas, lifted me and gave me a presence among poets. Honestly, the best part of me is in that grave and solemn mahogany box and it takes all my strength not to throw my body down on that casket and writhe with grief. But even if my Muse is gone, my dignity is still painfully intact. If I can offer you any condolences, and I sincerely doubt I can, but if I could it would be that so many of us, nearly all of us are losing the creator of our Talent. You are not alone, though lost. Starving in union, wordless, but never silent. I have. That was answer to all the questions which I had. Arman was a bigger looser than what I thought. He desperately opened that bedroom door in towel to prove them he got naked with me and portray that he got me laid. LOOSER that was all he was for me. And I liked Zahids honesty and calmness.I said thanx for letting me know about it and we would never discus it again, why to spoil mood by fretting over past. I then asked him why it that he likes me is. I expected a mature and sincere reply but his answer was just skin deep, he liked my beauty, and he was smitten by me every time I dress up well as in fests and he still remembers my pics which he saw in shorts and tank tops. Pheww!! Humpty Dumpty everywhere I thought, I just said hmm hmm and put it off nicely as I didn’t want to spoil it coz still it was a year to go in college and we were getting along very well.But when we were together in college, Zahid used to stare at me like anything! Once when we were in labs I kept a button open.
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