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“Remember, give me a half-hour and then come up. I’ll be waiting.” Then she went through the door.I couldn’t move right away. I felt like … I don’t know what I felt like. Gloria struck me harder and faster than even my pale dream had. Only this time there was no going slow and testing the waters before a date. I mean the pale one and I had had only shared a couple of quick kisses and I wasn’t even hopeful that our first official date would end up in the bedroom. Here I was struck by this slightly younger lady, we’d already shared a soul-searing kiss, getting my girls felt up nicely, and she was heading up to my hotel room. This was so unlike me, but I was loving it!It made for the longest half-hour of my life, but I tried to make it count. I touched base with several people, including my team. One lady, Marcie, gave me an interesting look and a small smile. “I see you and Gloria hit it off?” She whispered to me. I shrugged and she smiled wider.So thirty-minutes finally passed and I. She kept up acquaintances with a few people she had gone to school with, but none of these people would ever have thought of themselves as her friend. Through it all, Julia desperately longed for someone to love her unconditionally in spite of the fact that she knew how worthless a human being she was. Her emotional needs to be loved and cared for grew to be immense, and totally unrequited because she could never bring herself to reach out to anyone in her own age group for fear of the rejection she so deeply believed was her due.In place of real, nurturing relationships with other people her age, Julia wallowed in a sea of fairy tale fantasy. Her tiny bedroom at home, then her dorm room at college, were crammed full of trashy romance novels that she read over and over again. She especially loved the stories about some poor, worthless girl being rescued from her tawdry, boring life by a strong, self-assured hero who would love her and make all her decisions for her from then on..
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