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Part of me wanted to blame her for the whole mess. She was the one who'd fucked Vincenzo after all. She was the one who boned some guy at the party last night. It was all her. I was a victim. I wanted to hate her. But I couldn't. My brain kept going around and around in circles, like a dog chasing its tail. And the thought I kept coming back to time and time again was that Charlotte was only being Charlotte; to expect her to change would be to alter the very thing that I loved. There was poison in the cure indeed.In the end I decided that it was better for me to let the dream die and let her go back to being who she was, the beautiful, carefree, vivacious and beautiful Charlotte Lawsen, the girl who fucked whoever she wanted whenever she wanted, and had been perfectly happy at it until she'd met me.In the end, I realized that I didn't own her. To expect her to change would be to claim ownership of her somehow. I couldn't accept that. I liked her better free than simply another part. She had talked to him now and then over the back fence and when he was younger he mowed her yard a few times. But she worked a basic job and could not afford it since her husband left her two years back. If only he would pay attention to her. Younger men on the Internet liked older women. She had seen it on some of the adult sites she liked to watch. If only she had a man. Why could she not be a Cougar like that Matty at work? She thought and thought and devised a plan she just knew might work.The next morning she called Tim’s mother in the pretense of borrowing some sugar. “Oh Mrs. Miller,” she started. “This is Bonnie next door, and I’m sorry to bother you, but I started to make some cookies and ran out of sugar,” she added. “I don’t feel like going to the store, would it be possible to borrow a cup from you,” she finished.“Of course,” Mrs. Miller said. “Should I bring it over, or would you like to come over and pick it up,” Mrs. Miller added?“I could come over,” Bonnie hesitated..
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