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In the end though we realized his lack of friends and my discomfort with becoming sexual stems from the same thing. I can be pals with someone without thoroughly opening up to them. The physical is a wall. Being bisexual, both my male friends and female friends could breech it, but I’m uncomfortable with that. For Charlie, that wall has a great deal more importance in how he reacts to someone who might become a friend. Not thoroughly sharing a life, which to him means mind and body, because he always sees those who want to be friends as wanting him that way...”“Even before adolescence?” Joe asked.“I don’t find kids my age all that interesting,” Charlie explained. “They seem all too silly and capricious. Any bonds have been for the sake of the stage, and end as soon as the show’s done. Most of my stage partners get it. It’s an artificial relationship in the sense of artifice. They’ve either worked with me before, or have experience with it. Occasionally even one of those sort of. ” I broke bodily contact for the first time and reached over to rummage through my trouser pockets to find one."No not that," you said with a little anger in your voice.Confused but not put off, there was nothing to do but resume our lovemaking. It wasn’t long before the whisper came again, “You make me want to.” Hum… I was not going to make that mistake again! I eased myself on top of you thinking you must want to do it without a condom.You ‘tutted’ loudly and pushed me off. “Not that!” you barked.After a token ‘huff’, the lovemaking resumed and in time the whisper came again. I wasn’t going to fall for it a third time. “You want to what?” I asked.“You know. You make me want to.” You replied with the assumption a naive hormone-driven teenager would understand the complex workings of the female mind. I didn’t and was totally confused. The only ‘want to’ I knew translated as ‘do it’ and the only ‘do it’ I could think of was fucking; and that clearly wasn’t the ‘do it’ you had in.
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