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Aunt Joan's cheek rubbed my ear as she nodded. "That's right, Bobby. Theyhave a special website for kids and parents dealing with bed-wetting." Shebegan clicking through the site, pointing out where they had info about whysome kids wet their beds and how to wake up dry more often. We even spent alittle time scrolling through their message board, looking at post wherepeople were asking for help and getting advice and support."Wow, I kinda knew I wasn't the only kid who wet the bed, but I had no ideathere was so many." I tried to rub the sleep out of my eyes as I startedreading the next message.Cori leaned over my arm and looked at what I had up on the monitor. "Oh,that's another post from Anna. She's always got good advice. I've e-mailedher a couple of times when I had questions I didn't everyone to see. Ifyour mom says it's okay, I'll give you her address." I ain't got a computer." Oh ... well, does your mom let you borrow hers?" She ain't got one either." I was feeling both annoyed. Catholicism 1: Our shit is the One True Shit and we can trace our shit back to Jesus.Catholicism 2: If shit happens you deserve it. And Jesus died for your sins.Catholicism 3: You were born shit, you are shit, and you will die shit.Catholicism (Old) 1: mauris contingit (literally: that which stinks happens)Catholicism (Old) 2: excrementum contingit (plural: excreta)(literally: excrement happens)Catholicism (Charismatic): Shit is happening because you deserve it, but we love you anyway.Charismatic: Shit happens. Hallelujah! Praise the Lord!Christianity (generic) 1: Only holy shit happens.Christianity (generic) 2: Shit happens to sinnersChristianity (generic) 3: Catholics are full of shit.Chauvinism: We may be shit, but you can’t live without us!Christian Fundamentalism: Hell is where everyone must mind their own shit.Christian Science 1: Shit happening is all in your mind (You only think shit happens).Christian Science 2: Shit doesn’t happen and I am not up to my eyeballs in.
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