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“This man is a trespasser and, as he has no receipts for any of the goods carried about his person, I can only check each item with each of the house’s occupiers and invited guests to ensure they have not been stolen from the residents and guests during the said trespass. I have therefore confiscated anything which might not belong to him, leaving him with what clearly can be assumed to be his only.” He paused to allow everyone to see that the photographer stood up shivering in his undergarments. “Once he is able to supply acceptable receipts for the goods carried, which have been stored in this bag,” he held up the black plastic bag, “He can claim them back from my legal representative, Connors & Co, Room 6, The Anchor, Market Square, Sandmouth Bay, during normal office hours. May I give you all due notice that all trespassers will also be invited to surrender anything carried about their person for which you do not hold receipts acceptable to my legal representative. Further, I have. No stupid rubber to get in the way." She sighed, looking wistfully towards the computer room. I knew what was going through her head.I sat closer to her. "Why don't we jump 'em at midnight?" I suggested. "Swap partners."She turned to me, her eyes bloodshot from the pot and booze. "Oh, Steph, are you sure? I really want to, but I don't want to jeopardize our friendship." She held my hand, her eyes pleading.I thought about her husband Ken, blonde-haired, with a nice physique. His hair had started to recede, making him look older than his 30 years, but he was a good-looking man. I had no misgivings about having sex with him. In contrast, Dave was dark-haired, with a little bit of a gut, but also attractive (I married him, didn't I?). As long as it was a one-time thing, I had no problems with him sexing up our neighbor."Let's do it," I urged her, "But Ken will have to wear a condom." I had stopped taking the pill earlier this month, but better safe than sorry."Oh, yes." Jen paused,.
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