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Jordan reached for the waistband of her skirt and raised her hips to slip out of it.I closed my eyes and shook my head. When I looked again, Jordan was sitting there, properly dressed and still holding my hand. My heart was racing. I may have gotten into trouble for staring at Lisa Hartwell in school, but I had never imagined her undressing like that. Where had the thought about Jordan come from? Had I really accepted the fact that I wasn’t at home anymore and could think a little more freely? Did I really believe that I could think like that and get away with it? I had no answers, and I couldn’t ask Jordan. She wouldn’t understand. There was also the conflicting idea that I didn’t want her to think that I thought badly about her. She was very pretty, beautiful even, but I didn’t mean to think of her the way that vision portrayed.Focusing on her, the real her, I found her staring back at me. She patiently waited for me to make up my mind about her offer. I met her gaze, both trying. "We've grown apart over the last few years. I'm sure it's mostly my fault, and I want to apologize for it. I want you to know how much I love you and how much I miss being your friend."Beth was sobbing into the phone."Things are rough for me, R.J.," she told me. "I've closed some doors I wish I hadn't. You are the main one. Greg was so jealous of you and of us. He couldn't fathom that two people who had once been lovers could become close friends. So, I pushed you away. Now, the kids and Greg are driving me crazy. I've wanted to call for help so many times. But I couldn't bring myself to put my pride away and call you. I've been sorting through my life since Melissa was born. If you don't mind, I'd like to bring the kids to visit you in the spring. I know your Aprils aren't too busy, if that would be a good time."I told her I'd always make time for her."Don't ever worry about calling me," I told her. "You're the best friend I've ever had and there is nothing I wouldn't do for.
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