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Pick me up. Then, kiss me and I’ll turn into the most beautiful woman you have ever seen. I’ll then give you more sexual pleasure that you ever could have dreamed of.”The man looked at the frog for a short time, reached over, picked it up carefully, and placed it in his front breast pocket.Then the frog said, “What, are you nuts? Didn’t you hear what I said? I said kiss me and I will give you sexual pleasures like you have never had.”He opened his pocket, looked at the frog and said, “Nah, at my age I’d rather have a talking frog.”A group of kindergartners were trying to become accustomed to the first grade. The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher insisted on no baby talk.“You need to use ‘big people’ words,” she’d always remind them. She asked Chris what he had done over the weekend. “I went to visit my Nana.”“No, you went to visit your GRANDMOTHER. Use big people words!” She then asked Mitchell what he had done. “I took a ride on a choo-choo.”She said, “No, you took a. Oh, I was so spent! I fell heavily upon a chair and fanned myself. Myparents looked on me fondly, and suggested it may soon be time toretire."My parents"; how quickly my attitude toward them had changed. But theywere in all respects but one my own loving mother and father, no onecould wish for a better. It would be unjust of me to refrain from givingthem the one thing they most desired, which was my affection.I may be an untutored child of the streets (save for the saintly vicar),but I was wise enough to apprehend that something was amiss. Why did myheart flutter at the very sight of you? Why did your every word andgesture cause me to lose all composure?Upon the next visit of the doctor, his accustomed meeting with hispatient, I confronted him with my concerns."It is my feelings, sir," I stated bluntly. "They are not natural." And would you say that you yourself are, now, a natural creature?"At first the question angered me, it seemed like a slap in the face. Butof course he had the.
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