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Shit she thought as she noticed that the joint she had snuffed out was still giving off smoke from her ashtray. Shit, shit, shit! God damn it, it's time for some damage control before everything is ruined. "Certainly officer and I apologize for sounding rude." She opened the door and swung her legs outside then realized too late that she was giving him quite a show, her skirt ridding up so far that he could probably see her panties. Oh well, that couldn't possible hurt her now and it might even help."Please step to the rear of your car ma'am and put your hands on the trunk and spread your legs."Jesus she thought, that's the position the cops use for a body search. Certainly he wasn't going to search her, not out here on the street and without a female officer present to do the search. Even this dip shit wouldn't be that dumb. "Certainly officer." She walked to the back of the Jag and leaned over, her hands high up on the trunk, her breasts pressing into the car as she spread her legs. "Ewwww," she squealed."Finish your breakfast!" said Valerie stridently. "No more talk about underwear. If you miss the bus I'll have to take you, and I have work to do!"They did as they were told, but we'd cut it too thin. The bus was pulling away from the stop three houses down as the kids ran out the door. Valerie sighed, but the kids were happy to ride in their new car.That left me alone in the house.To plot my revenge.I thought about probably a dozen things I could do. Then I decided that most people would probably think of those things as "pranks" or practical jokes. I've never understood why such jokes could be considered "practical". There's nothing practical about them. And most people would probably regard the things I thought of as cruel. Like spiking something she was going to eat with some of my special hot sauce, which I got from a guy who travels to Africa frequently. I told him one time that I like hot spicy food, and he brought me back a jar of this reddish brown paste.
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