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’ ‘I…I’m flattered, really flattered Tony, but it’s …I’ve not done this before and not sure if I can,’ I stammered again. ‘ ¿ Have you ever been with a woman?’ he wrote. ‘Yes.’ ‘Well it’s almost the same, only tighter. It’s done doggie fashion. Both men on their knees,’ he wrote. ‘I love you and need you. It’s been a long time since I’ve had sex in this way and that was only a one night stand. I didn’t love the other man but I needed what he could give me. I need you now. Please! Please make love to me in this way.’ It sounded, if that’s the right way of saying it, that he was begging me to fuck him. His hand was now stroking me and I came up into a full erection. Could I? Should I? Will I? Well you’ve already sucked on his cock, a voice in my head said, so why not do as he asked. Do you love him enough as he loves you to do this for him? Will he want to do the same to me, I asked? Probably, the voice said. But see to him and if he enjoys it, well, let’s wait and see. . Even though this might look like some old fashioned style of courtship, Gary never made any overt sexual approach to Jana, and this was also puzzling and confusing to her. Bewildered, even frighten by, the powerful emotions battling within her, Jana found herself becoming increasingly sexually aroused. The once adequate Guy substitute, her vibrator, no long sufficed to meet her needs. Many may shrug such emotions off as unimportant, but those who have endured them know the pain they bring with them * * * * * * * * Now I must turn to an aspect of the story that holds within it the deepest mystery of all. I cannot affirm the veracity of what I am about to relate, I only repeat as faithfully as I can what was told to me. It was just over a year since Gary had come to live with Jana and she was at what proved to be the height of her emotional crisis. During her lunch breaks she had taken to agitatedly walking the streets adjacent to the library, as if the physical exercise might burn.
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