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Now I would never get the chance to tell him everything that needed to be said. I clutch my pillow tight to my body squeezing as if it were him. Tears roll down my face. Lying myself back down against the pillows I cried myself to sleep. The next morning I wake up praying that last night had just been a terrible nightmare but knowing damn well it had not been. My baby cousin was truly gone. The young man I considered my brother from the very start was dead and I would never get to see him again. For the next few days, it felt as if I was walking around in a complete trance. Just going through the motions. Yes I was physically there but mentally I had completely checked out. There were times when I wished I could just curl into bed, pull the covers over my head, and just stay there. The day of the wake was also the day of a horrible snowstorm. We all piled into the van and made the dangerous drive to the funeral home. The entire time I say in the backseat praying that we would not. " That's about all I can say about it," I said as I finished up."That's a lot for a 13 year old, much less an adult," Anna observed. "And you never regretted it? Never regretted not having a childhood?" Not for a second. Yeah it was tough as hell and there were times where I wondered if I could make it. But I never regretted it. As for my lost childhood? I never had one to begin with. I was an orphan in an orphanage filled with more orphans. I was just a mouth to feed and a body to clothe. By becoming a Privateer, I beat the system that doesn't prepare us for the real world. She knows what I'm talking about." I pointed at Katherine who nodded."But enough of that. We need to come up with some preliminary plans for our trip to Prime. I have a feeling Philippe wants us gone in a few days and he wants to make sure we aren't going to do something stupid. Sam, is the room secure?" With Sam plugged into the hotel room's system, she could monitor the security devices that were embedded in to.
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