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We still do it all the time. I get the best results with her simply by sticking my tongue up into her bung pie as far as I can and massaging her rump while tossing her salad. Sometimes she farts right away but sometimes it can take 20 minutes. The romance saved our marriage. That and Jesus. You do the math. I figure that 3 farts per week over a year works out to about 156 farts. So in 20 years, I've inhaled over 3100 farts.”Marcus cleared his throat and continued. “I also love to fart! I have a nice wrangler ass bubble butt that looks delectably juicy in faded skintight jeans or tight and squeaky shiny and squeaky vibrating vinyl or leather pants! I love to rip ass in my tight jeans with no underwear or slide around on a vinyl seat in a bar or restaurant with my leather pants on so I can dig the vibration and sexy fart sounds that it makes. I just love to fart in my black leather pants. The way it smells with the leather gets me hot. My farts smell like eggs or broccoli! Yuppers!. “Good morning, darling.” She smiled and kissed my lips. “Jason knows a tattooist in the village and he’ll take us down there when we’re ready.”“Yeah,” Jason said, joining us, “but I didn’t tell you that she’s my ex-wife.”“Oh, cool,” Gayle giggled, “we’ll be able to compare notes.”“She’ll probably try to seduce you,” he said and we waited for the explanation. “I caught her out here with another woman enjoying a very noisy and very wet sixty-nine.”“And you didn’t join in?”He grinned wryly. “Well, normally, I would have… like a shot. But the other woman was my sister.”“So, you were cuckolded?” Gayle said, unsuccessfully trying to hide a smile.“Yes, I suppose I was.”My wife got off my lap and straddled him. “No suppose about it,” she laughed. “You were cuckolded.”“All right, I was.”“Are they still together?”“No, the last time I heard anything about my sister was three years ago. She’d joined a lesbian commune in America.”“Look, Jason,” I said, “if it’s going to be awkward for you, just.
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