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They all have literary pretensions but they are horn dogs, too. So, no problems?" Of course there were problems when they found out who was inviting them! I believe it was Allison who stated it most succinctly, 'No way! That little fucker just wants to get me alone so he can knock me up. How stupid does he think I am?'" But you explained about..." The 'Magic Diaphragm,' yes. I promised on my word as a leprechaun that so long as they wore it, no one would be able to get them pregnant." And they believed you?" People always believe leprechauns; we cannot lie." Yeah, but you didn't tell them..." Shut up! Do you want to spoil the climax of your own story?" Er, not the climax!" I agreed. Sometimes Louie wasn't such a bad imp."Well, here we are at the station. I'll be going to the train." Thanks," I said trying to extricate myself from the ridiculous vehicle and maintain as much dignity as possible. After all, I was trying to make a good impression on six of the greatest writers in the ASS. I snuck into first class to steal booze. I knew I would never get in, so I grabbed a tampon and walked towards the front of the cabin. Once I made it into the next cabin a stewardess stopped me and asked if she could help me. It wasn’t exactly a question meant to see how i was doing given the fact that it was accompanied by a glare that told me to get the hell back where I belonged. Not one to let that deter me on my whiskey induced mission, I told her that to people were joining the mile high club in the restroom in my cabin and I really needed a restroom. With that I hinted at the tampon in my pocket and she finally softened up. I hid in the bathroom until I was sure I could sneak out unseen. I looked out of the bathroom, my eyes seeking the drink cart, completely oblivious to anything else. I found it unattended in between rounds and swiped two mini bottles of a fancy vodka off of a little shelf. Quickly I tried to make my way back to my seat, but i didn’t even make it out of.
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