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I wanted them to begin relating to me with controlling their activity, putting some order and structure into what happened. That way, they might associate expected or anticipated events with my providing them. My plan was simple, how I planned to carry it out was also simple, the outcome of it seemed complex with so many variables. Plus, from experience, the success of my plans was about 50/50, at best.As part of my plan, I made the dogs sit and wait before I put each bowl down for them next to the end of the counter. I had just eaten so I was good for the evening so I could just watch their interaction and consider my next actions. I was very conscious of my body as I moved around them, keeping my legs together and trying hard not to allow my mind to get ahead of myself anticipating what was to be a certain eventuality. My previous experience with dogs was always very controlled and intentional, even if not by me. I didn’t really have any experience with how attraction to a woman. I was a runner. The day was clear and at five thirty I made my pick up. I went to a house on the edge of Mexicantown and walked through the gates, the armed guards, the snarling dogs. Inside I stripped down and was given the product, cut for sale. My clothes were searched and when they were clean I redressed with the package. I was dropped off near Greektown and went on my route. Drop off the coke, pick up the take from the previous day. Drop, pick, drop, pick, ten of twelve down. He came out from a blind alley and swung the pipe at my head. I went down and my vision swam, I saw double. I wasn’t going to fight it, I gave up the dope and the cash, expected him to leave me alone. He was homeless, jaundiced, smelled like ten days of shit. He had Hepatitis and probably HIV and I wanted him gone. But he thought I was pretty with my milk skin, my bright red hair, those pretty eyes everybody seems to love and nobody’s ever seen. I was five ten but starving thin, he was over six feet and.
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