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Her question, and all that it implied, wasn't so simple I could make an off the cuff judgement. Was I ready to move from one relationship into another? Could I devote myself to Jean, knowing of all the parts and pieces of my previous life floating around? Was this even something I wanted right now?It was the last question which brought things into clarity for me. I firmly believe that there are only so many chances and opportunities in life and that if you don't take them, you end up missing out. Jean was ... special; special in a way that I was only barely able to fathom. No matter how badly I wanted to be on the inside, to be in a family, to be part of a household, I was NOT one to allow people in. Perhaps my whole viewpoint on life was jaded but I'd grown up in places that could make Hell look pleasant; many of the people I'd dealt with in my life were the kind that could make you believe in literal evil. Of necessity, I'd built walls around me, walls to keep me safe, walls to. There were rises and valleys and hillocks, and the terrain was a little rougher but our visibility was great. We could see into the woods for several yards in all directions as we drove. It allowed us to see ahead of us as we went and to notice changes as we drove by. We spotted deer, rabbits, and a ton of tree climbing rodents that looked like squirrels.The trail went on for quite a while. It first climbed a hill for a couple of miles and then dropped into a trench that ran to the northwest. We followed that trench for another five miles until it opened up into a narrow valley. The trail turned sharply to the left and head up another hill for a couple of miles before turning south for about a dozen miles. Near the end of its course it turned west again and dropped down a short slope into a glade. Once across the glade the trail went over a rise and through some dense thickets once more. That portion of the trail went on for three miles before it came to an end.The end was another.
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