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When we got settled I opened a bottle of wine and got started in the kitchen. With the chicken curry simmering, I sat beside her on the couch and attempted to be everything that a woman wanted – modest, endearing, charming. It was all blown when she pointed out the handcuffs hanging from the radiator. In my quick tidy-up, I had failed to notice that remnant of a drugged up party night still lingering. In all honesty it was a joke. A friend thought it was funny to handcuff a stuffed animal to the radiator. I had removed the stuffed bear the day before, but had forgotten about the handcuffs… DRUGS!!!So, I tried to explain my way out of it. I guess I did a pretty good job, because she stayed for the curry, and gave me high complements. We had a really nice time talking about ourselves – who we were, who we wanted to be.With a bit of awkwardness, we started to make out on the couch. At which point she said that it was time to make up her mind. The last bus back to her city. I was hoping he'd share situations that he’s come across with other men. I wanted to know that my decision to like men is not dirty in any way. I wanted to hear his thoughts on the subject. I think my mother would be open to me liking both sexes. I’m not sure she’d want to share my stepfather with me. I wasn't planning on telling my mom about anything that I planned to do. My name is Ryan and I’m nineteen. I recently left college to take a semester off. I was involved in a relationship with a guy name Jason. We were dating for a little while, but we were caught giving each other blow jobs. Some of the other kids were teasing Jason. Jason was very embarrassed from the situation. He had never been with another guy before and was experimenting with me. It was too much for him to handle and he committed suicide. I found him hung by the ceiling. He hung himself in shame. The whole situation left me confused about my own sexuality.I left college and went to live with my mom and stepfather..
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