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After a few hours I finally located him in one of the few high class bordellos in the city. He was even reasonably sober. As he was finished with his business there we left and walked down the street, getting reacquainted and catching up on what we'd been up to since we had last seen one another. Then I brought up the reason I'd wanted to see him. “ I've got something going, Jack, that could pay off pretty good if it works out for you, me, and my other partners, but I need some help from you. Let me ask you something, is your reputation here as bad as it should be? Do the powers that be know about your little games and shenanigans, or are you pretty clean? “ Sam, I've been very careful about my name, I even have a little store that is run for me by a Mexican fellow I helped when he was in trouble with a loan shark. That gives me an alibi for my income. I can show my face anywhere in town, and have.” “ What about your poker games?” “ When I play poker with the bigwigs I never try to. I looked at her and couldn’t help myself. I just ran over there and started humping her like crazy.”“Oh my,” exclaimed the first 2 dogs, “I can understand why she would want to put you down for that.”“Oh, I’m not here to be put down, she dropped me off to get my nails trimmed.”“Doctor,” the embarrassed man said, “I have a sexual problem. I can’t get it up for my wife anymore.”“Mr. Garrett, bring her back with you tomorrow and let me see what I can do.”The next day, the worried fellow returned with his wife.“Take off your clothes, Mrs. Garrett,” the medic said. “Now turn all the way around. Lie down please. Uh-huh, I see. Okay, you may put your clothes back on.”The doctor took the husband aside. “You’re in perfect health,” he said. “Your wife didn’t give me an erection either.”A priest goes duck hunting with a friend. They are in the duck blind when one flies by. The friend takes a shot and misses.“God dammit, I missed!”“Son,” says the priest. “That’s not pleasing to God and could.
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