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So, I retreated back into my head each night, playing out my love life in my dreams. A grown man's face always gazed upon me in these fantasies, as I touched my breasts or slid my hand into my panties, pretending it was him touching me. He would whisper sweet somethings to me after we made love. By twenty, I turned to the online world for companionship. I started writing as a way to express myself, hoping to find a connection that way. One day a reader messaged me asking if I wanted to chat. His name was Richard. What did I have to lose? So, I engaged with him. Surprisingly, he began asking lots of questions about me. Not the typical, “How old are you?” or “What kind of movies do you watch?” He dug deeper. “What makes you happy?” No one had ever asked me that question before. I told him learning and exploring made me happy.Our conversation grew from there. We quickly switched to the phone after finding it hard to chat with the volume of information we were now sharing with each. I will take these keys and keep them somewhere safe. If you decide not to go ahead tomorrow night, it’s fine, we will not discuss it further, but there will be no opportunity to reconsider. If you do, I will talk you through my requirements and expectations before we finalise things.”I couldn’t get the word “finalise” out of my mind at that point, it made me realise I would be hers if I agreed. “One more request”, she asked, as if it was anything other than an order, “I’d appreciate it if you could refrain from masturbation or sex for the next 24 hours, I don’t want an orgasm clouding your judgment”. “Yes, Aurelia, of course”, I managed to respond.Overnight and through the next day, I couldn’t get our conversation off my mind. Aurelia, while twelve years my junior, was ahead of me in every way. Intelligent, talented, confident; the thought of her being my keyholder was both exhilarating and terrifying. There was only ever going to be one answer.“So, what’s your decision?”, Aurelia.
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