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Well, it would be nice, mum said; when were you thinking of going? I've seen a good deal leaving in a couple of weeks, I replied, do you think you could get the time off work? (she works on the checkout in a supermarket). Well, I'll certainly try, she said, I'm owed a few days anyway. I'll let you know. She was really beginning to sound quite excited by the idea, and I thought: I've got her hooked! I'll wait to hear, then, I said.I didn't have long to wait. She phoned back the very next day to say that she was coming. That's brilliant, I said, I'll get it booked straight away. Where is it anyway, she asked, but I said I'll keep you guessing, but I can guarantee it will be warm and sunny. Lovely, she said, I must sort out some clothes. All you'll need is a few bikinis and some skimpy dresses, I said. Oh, and can you pack your shiny leggings and your one-piece swimsuit. Ok, she said.On the appointed day I had arranged to pick her up at 10 o'clock. She opened the door to. My initial offering lay in a mountain of mess with a glistening peak. The towel had taken some splashback as had the back of my jeans, arse and thighs. I had also forgotten about toilet paper.Reaching behind, I was wet and messy to the touch. I studied my shit smeared hand while pondering my next move, the phrase ’dirty girl” reverberating in my head. I liked it. It felt right. I had never been a girly girl. I mean, I liked being a girl, but I wasn’t delicate or fragrant, well not right now anyway.I came to a sudden decision, pulled up my panties and jeans and wiped my shitty hand on the front of my t-shirt. I was going to stew in my own mess for a bit.Grabbing another towel and bin liner, I put them on the couch and sat down. It felt a bit damp, a bit slick, it was like sitting in slippery oil. I could get used to this I thought as I pressed play on my phone. Not bad, just got the right angle – oh, my God! My arsehole peeled open, bulged, then out poured a torrent of poop! My heart.
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