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I was still sipping the coffee when Dr Silverman returned and handed me a sheaf of paper. “We couldn’t find your brain on the MRI so I’ve got some written tests I’d like you to try. Simple stuff, a six year old could do them. I’ll come back for them in about an hour.”I don’t know what sort of six year olds Dr Silverman consorted with but I found the tests quite challenging, a mixture of IQ-style reasoning tests and current affairs questions. I didn’t know the answers to a few of the current affairs questions but overall I thought I’d given a good account of myself.Dr Silverman returned about an hour later and collected the papers. He skimmed through them. “Not bad,” he commented, “though you’re not as savvy as my four year old granddaughter Cindy.” Then he gave me to wink to confirm he wasn’t serious.“The bad news is that you’re absolutely going to hate the next part,” said Dr Silverman. “The even worse part is that you’ll have to eat some more hospital food afterwards. But first we. This story is about the time my cute younger sister Ronnie decided to wear a ballerina costume to a costume party being sponsored by the Police Athletic League on the West Side of town. My name is Louie and my friends called me Lew but my real name was Lewis which I really hate and never use. Ronnie was also officially dubbed at birth Veronica which sounds a lot classier than plain old Ronnie, but was too close for comfort to a popular cartoon character with dubious moral standards and sexy clothing. We both belonged to the P.A.L. because it was the only club in our less than snazzy neighborhood in downtown Manhattan. Our Uncle was a bigwig Police Department mucky-muck but he generally stayed away from us because he had a reputation to uphold. Our mom was a widow, at least she told everyone she was a widow, but I had my suspicions about that and the string of "Uncles" that paraded through our tiny apartment like a changing of the guard didn't fill me with confidence in the existence.
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