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Now you know why he doesn't have a girlfriendMRE Dinner DateI had a date the other night at my place. On the phone the day before, the girl asked me to "Cook her something she's never had before" for dinner. After many minutes of scratching my head over what to make, I finally settled on something she has DEFINITELY, definitely had never eaten before. I got out my trusty case of MRE's. (Meal, Ready-to-Eat) Field rations that when eaten in their entirety contain 3000+ calories in each meal.Here's what I made: I took three of the Ham Slices out of their plastic packets, took out three of the Pork Chops, three packets of Chicken-a-la-king and eight packets of dehydrated butter noodles and some dehydrated/rehydrated rice.I cooked the Ham Slices and Pork Chops in one pan, sauted in shaved garlic and olive oil. In another pot, I blended the Chicken-a-la-king, noodles, and rice together to make a sort of mush that looked suspiciously like succotash. I added some spices, and blended. "Jenny, what were you thinking when you used that?"It took her a moment to calm down enough to speak. She wiped her eyes and started talking."I was sitting there thinking that nobody cared. My Mom was such a bitch, I knew she would flip if she found out about the baby. I thought about Ryan and how he no longer gave a damn about me now that he got what he wanted. Then, I did it. I took the knife and reached over and did my left wrist first. It hurt badly. I tried to do the other one, but my left was no longer strong enough. I just leaned back against the tree and thought about how I wished someone cared. Things just faded to black. The next thing I remember is waking up in the hospital with you sitting next to me."She started sobbing again. She turned and buried her face into again."Oh Mark, How could I do that to myself, to my baby. Thank you for being there to keep me from succeeding and making that huge mistake."I pulled her face from my chest and wiped the tears from her.
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