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“Come in,” she said.The two men walked in and looked around, spotting me instantly. The taller of the two had graying hair, a walrus mustache and a rough exterior. He looked like he had seen and experienced it all. The other one looked like a nerd who had escaped from a science lab. He didn’t wear glasses but his hair cut and style suggested he was detail oriented. The part was razor straight and there wasn’t a single hair out of place. His eyes moved around the room like he was going to be tested on what he saw here later. Maybe he would be? I didn’t know.“I’m Sheriff Dalton,” she said, pulling out her wallet and flipping it open to a very real looking badge. “This is Seth Connors.”The taller detective looked from her to me and back again. “We scoured the parking lot and surrounding area around Brozos House. We didn’t find anyone matching the description you gave us.”That worried me. If Neil slipped away from the police, he could be anywhere.Woodruff looked at me pointedly. “Do you. And it has nothing to do with you not being attractive. You are. You’re cute, and that dress showed me you have a nice body. But we’re not compatible. I just don’t think it would be much fun.”“I AM fun!” Crystal protested.“Yes, as a friend. As a date. Let me ask you this. How do you have sex?”“The normal way. You kiss, he gets on top and does it.”“And you have an orgasm?”“Sometimes.”“And that’s it? That’s sex?”“Duh! Yes!”I shook my head, “No. Not even close. Look, if that makes you happy, I’m cool with that. But that’s not sex in my mind. I mean, yes, it qualifies, barely, as sex, but that’s not enough.”“Barely? Either it is or it isn’t!”“Go back to Kansas, Dorothy. You can’t be Vesper to my James Bond.”“Why are you being such a jerk about this?”“You mean why am I being honest? Because anything else results in frustration or disappointment or even anger.”“So you wouldn’t do it with me unless I agreed to do those things?”“We’re not negotiating, Crystal,” I sighed. “You’ve made it.
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