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I don’t need to suddenly standstraight up when I’m under the coffee table.8. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur beforeentering the house - not after.9. I will not come in from outside,and immediately drag my butt across the carpet.10. I will not sit in the middle of the livingroom, and lick my crotch11. The cat is not a ‘squeaky toy’,so when I play with him and he makes that noise,it’s usually not a good thing.P.S. Dear God:When I get to Heaven,may I have my testicles back?Some Random Thoughts... Someone Just Honked to get me out of my parking spot faster so now I have to sit here until both of us are dead.So I was at the bar last night and the Waitress Screamed... “Anyone know CPR?”I said, “Hell I know the entire alphabet.”Everyone laughed... Well everyone except this one guy!Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up too!Unless you are in prison!From a friend of J & G.Three pilots “flew west” on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. ‘In honor of the. I sucked passionately for about 2 hours. He came in my mouth. He sucked me for about 2 minutes. I came in his mouth. We talked. He fed me snacks.In the morning my clothes were washed and breakfast and shower were prepared.I did that all week.That weekend was the same.My friend liked grooming me. Both literally and figuratively. As he was combing my hair, trimming my nails, eyebrows, and rubbing lotion on me, he asked me, Why go through that hell of a home life, when you come sit right here? I really loved it when he rubbed my head with his hands. It was some of the best times I felt in my life. I called my mom and told her I was going to stay up here a while. She said good. It will get you out of my hair.One time I overheard another guy complaining about how easy I had it because I was sucking my friend.My friend said, You had different reasons why you came here. Sex was a nice extra with you. He didn't come here to have a place to stay. He didn't need anything. He wasn't begging.
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