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..my...damn...legs..." This is why I'm on the executive board, and you're working in the lobbycoffee shop!" Becca continued to yell. "If you would just spend an hourdressing yourself up in the morning-" -Then I would become a prude like you!" Kaylee snapped back in a fullyfeminine voice."Excuse me?!" Becca gasped incredulously. "I am not a prude! I was theone who convinced you that we would better be suited to the job market aswomen! I was the one who suggested that we get these skinsuits! I wasthe one-" -Who tries to guilt me by telling me I'm insignificant because I work ina coffee shop!" Kaylee snapped again. "I happen to like my job, and Ihappen to like not having to dress up! I like having that extra hour ofsleep!" She grabbed a bedpost and tried to lift her legs into the skin."Even so, you should be getting up earlier! I'm your only ride to work!" Then go! I'll find some other way to get to work!" No one else will drive you!" Then can't you just spend five stupid. Hell, we've replaced the wacky neighbor on sitcoms.(Suck it, Mr. Roper!) In my day, the closest to a lez on TV was Miss Hathaway on Beverly Hillbillies reruns.That sight alone almost scared me straight ... almost.I don't remember when I first realized my sexuality. It might be the tingling I felt watching Laverne and her closeted lover, Shirley, holding hands, skipping through Milwaukee. Later, my 24/7 fantasies of Britney Spears erased the last vestiges and sealed my fate. I'm the most insecure woman on the planet, thus I didn't want to be gay. Paranoia set in, crushing me in its wake. I pictured classmates pointing and whispering behind my back. All I wanted was to be like one of the cool kids on Saved By the Bell. (Mmmmmm Tiffani Thiessen). But, I ruined any chance of that when I tried to organize a Donny and Marie fan club my freshman year. Regardless, I fought to maintain my hetero facade, even trying out for cheerleader with dismal results: "Push Em back. Push em back. Way....
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