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Q: Where should 60-plus year olds look for eye glasses?A: On their foreheads.Q: What is the most common remark made by 60-plus year olds when they enter antique stores?A: “Gosh, I remember these!”Great Quotes“There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz SL500.” Lynn Lavner“It isn’t premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married.” George Burns“Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.” Sharon Stone“My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.” Jack Nicholson“Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks his car or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is.” Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady)“Ah, yes, divorce ... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet.” Robin Williams“According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do. She came out around five minutes later and went back into the room, completely ignoring me again. This was not gonna be easy, not by a long shot.I scraped through my morning routine (mostly) and went down to breakfast, where everyone but Rita and I were already at. I sat down and stared at my food. I didn’t realize how hungry I was until it was right in front of me, but my hunger got put on hold when Rita came down wearing a giant bathrobe I didn’t even know she owned. She saw me and turned around and went back upstairs, and my heart dropped, I wanted to break down right there, but I had to stay strong if I wanted to get her back. The tension in that room was so high anything said could have turned into an argument.“Ok, I wanna know what happened and I wanna know right now!” dad spoke up.“It’s nothing we can’t fix dad, just a lot of confusion and misunderstanding and stuff,” I said.“That’s not telling me what happened.”“It’s really embarrassing dad, for both of us...”“Well you better.
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