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“There will be times in the future you spank over her clothes just so that she doesn’t get used to only bare ass spankings. The feelings are different,” she explained that I’d want to strip her down while I was spanking her then as well. “Give her twenty over the skirt, ten over the panties, and then the rest on the bare ass maybe,” she suggested.She had Hayden get down on all fours and put her legs apart wide with her feet on display for the webcam.“You want her to be as vulnerable and exposed as possible. You don’t want her closing her legs and protecting the meaty, pink parts. She’ll try clamming up,” Betty suggested I find ways to do my affirmations like that.I didn’t know what that word meant. I had heard of Stuart Smalley’s affirmations where he has says “I am good enough, I am smart enough and dammit people like me!” into a mirror on old Saturday Night Live episodes but it sounded like something Oprah would do and not part of BDSM.“That is where you ask her those questions.. I was sure I was going to learn more about his style on top of what Trudy had already given me.The shock went deeper when he asked me deeper, more personal questions about my parents. I admitted I knew nothing about how they met or their romance leading them to marriage. He showed me a report, a birth certificate, and a wedding license. My mother had become pregnant with me by my father. She was wild and “easy” as the term was used then. Both families made sure the two got married. The tight, controlling, and conservative religious element of our lives was punishing and controlling of my mother and me. I had heard of the expression ‘the sins of the father’ but this was ‘sins of the mother’. It was expected that without rigid, tight interventions I would follow the same path as my mother. Some of this my mother had apologized for when I was getting ready to leave home. Some were still new to me. It helped explain, though, the choices I had made in my life, the kinds of men.
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