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It doesn’t make sense. ‘Sex feels good…’ James tried to argue, but there was no point. It wasn’t a logical thing. It was a defense mechanism, as powerful as a child’s urge to move his hand quickly away from a hot stove. Tanya wouldn’t listen anymore. ‘I promised myself that I would not give away my body sexually as I had done in the past. I tried those things, but they are in my past.’ ‘Did you enjoy it at all?’ ‘It doesn’t matter. What’s done is done.’ James broke up with Tanya a few weeks later. The emotions were overwhelming. Somewhere deep in his psyche, he snapped. He found himself alone, sometimes in front of a mirror, asking tough questions. ‘I don’t understand. I want a best friend and a lover. I want someone to open up. Someone who understands me. I can’t find that. I don’t understand.’ These women were jaded. Hurt. Angry. Never again, they said. It’s over, James told himself through clenched teeth. I’m finished playing the ‘good guy.’ I don’t want another man’s sloppy. Not that she would reciprocate of course. For the thousandth time he cursed himself for being such a wimp.If he stopped to think about it, he knew that Mike wasn’t the first lover she had. He just kept his blinders on and tried to make her happy. She would put out as much as he wanted and she kept her lovers discreet. He kept her in clothes, cars, and jewelry despite the fact that they really couldn’t afford it. She kept him in decent pussy whenever he wanted. While this wasn’t the relationship he had dreamed of, he felt that as they got older she would see that he was the man for her and they would eventually settle into the type of relationship he longed for. Then came Mike Stanton.The first thing he noticed was that she cut him off. After two weeks of no sex he finally had enough. He canceled her credit cards. Limited access to her debit card and put her BMW in storage. At 5’ 9” and 150 pounds there was no way that he was going to stand up to her current lover whom she met at the.
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