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"I've accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles.My next crap could spell disaster.Went out last night and got really wasted.I woke up this morning next to a fat old bird who was snoring and farting ... so, at least I got home OK.The wife's back on the warpath again.She was up for making a home video last night and all I did was suggest we should hold auditions for her part.Angela Merkel arrives at Passport Control in Athens airport."Nationality?" asks the immigration officer."German," she replies."Occupation?"No, just here for a few days."As the coffin was being lowered into the ground at a Parking Officer's funeral, a voice from inside screams:"I'm not dead, I'm not dead. Let me out!"The Vicar smiles, leans forward, sucking air through his teeth and mutters,"Too late, mate, the paperwork's already done."I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night.Or "foreplay" as she likes to call it.After both suffering from depression for a while, me and the missus were going to. I could also feel his penis swell below my head and he now carressed the side of my face with his free hand.This was driving my crazy lying there being groped, wondering what his next move was. I was determined to remain asleep to him, but I was wanting him to do something else.I knew if he went into my knickers he would know I was in a state of sexual arousal, so anticipating that, I turned to face him, ever so quietly as not to draw attention to us in the back, but just to make access to my belt and zipper, on my pants easier to open.I could sense him tense up and wait, but as soon as I relaxed and breath rythmeticly on his hand, he continued with his little grope.What surprised me next was not the crotch feel I anticipated, but that he undid his zipper and eased his cock out, and right into my face.I remained still as he found my warm nipple again and resumed his playing until it swelled again to his manipulations and now he knew I was responding.He started to masturbate across my.
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Being carless I relied on public transportation to get me back and forth to work. The ride in the evening was sometimes OK, but the morning ride was usually chock full of shirtless beauties walking, jogging, and occasionally riding the bus. Last week during a brief warm snap, I had spotted several Hispanic boys riding the 2nd bus I normally rode, and I was looking forward to seeing them this week, and I was not disappointed.As I sat waiting on my 2nd bus, here they came, all shirtless and speaking Spanish. Tan smooth skin, dark hair and eyes, and that Spanish accent that drove me wild. They stopped at the bus stop and started counting money, I knew I was in for a NICE bus ride home. I guessed they were all still in their teens, roughly 5'9" tall, smooth and all well defined. The leader of the group had a nice 8-pack, one had a nice defined 6-pack and the third while not as defined, was still nice to look at. I tried not to stare, but I couldn't help myself, by their conversation, and.

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