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This is an open forum. John, can you explain what excites you about that situation?”I sighed, “Patel is a pretty unsavory guy, he-”Nicole interrupted, “Uhm, he’s like five foot five, balding, kind of fat, has weird Indian-guy hair, is addicted to strippers, let me repeat that, is openly addicted to strippers and talks constantly about them like they’re his friggin girlfriends…I mean, your co-workers are techy guys, I get that, and some of them are crazy anti-social, but this guy is just outright repulsive. On, like, a base level. That’s why this is so….well….”The therapist laughed a bit in order to add levity to the situation. My wife failed to mention that Patel was a multi-millionaire thanks to his dealings in the tech startup scene. She failed to mention that his stripper ramblings were tongue-in-cheek party talk that came from a man with few social graces and deep, deep personal insecurities. Or, that when we attended one of these pool parties, he stared at her wet. He picked it up inthe dim light he could make out the title -The Idiot's Guide to AdvancedSpells . This might do the trick. Back to burn the midnight oil &actually study the book. There were spells for turning people into toads & while this wastempting for the life of him young Engelbert couldn't see how this wouldbenefit him in this situation, ditto for some spells involving animalcrackers. There was a spell to transport yourself to a world called OZ,the place seemed like a real dump with a whole city turning green withmold. Spells to keep demons away, spells to keep vampires away, spells tokeep women from marrying you - useful no doubt, but nothing fit hissituation. The last spell was "BODY SWITCHING MADE EASY!" This lookedpromising. Humm! but who would be dumb enough to switch bodies with oldDean Phug, also who could he trust and what could he offer them? First heneeded to collect the ingredients. Hair from both, a glass which both haddrunk water from, a Calvin Coolidge picture..
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