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Sticking my nose into someone’scrotch is an unacceptable way of saying ‘hello’.7. I don’t need to suddenly standstraight up when I’m under the coffee table.8. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur beforeentering the house - not after.9. I will not come in from outside,and immediately drag my butt across the carpet.10. I will not sit in the middle of the livingroom, and lick my crotch11. The cat is not a ‘squeaky toy’,so when I play with him and he makes that noise,it’s usually not a good thing.P.S. Dear God:When I get to Heaven,may I have my testicles back?Some Random Thoughts... Someone Just Honked to get me out of my parking spot faster so now I have to sit here until both of us are dead.So I was at the bar last night and the Waitress Screamed... “Anyone know CPR?”I said, “Hell I know the entire alphabet.”Everyone laughed... Well everyone except this one guy!Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up too!Unless you are in prison!From a friend of J & G.Three pilots “flew west” on. Somehow the ball stayed in the glove and I jumped to my feet waving the glove around in excitement. I had just caught the last out of a twenty-seven man no hitter. My team mates mobbed me and hoisted me up in the air as everyone was doing the baseball victory bounce. When we finally finished celebrating, the crowd was still standing, applauding. Now that is embarrassing. I looked up in the stands to see the girls with Paul standing with them. How about that, I pitched a no hitter with scouts watching.In the locker room the coach got me aside and said, "You know you were being scouted by almost every major league team. I saw the scout from the team you interned with sitting with the girls in the ninth. Do you know him?" He's sort of a friend and really taught me a lot about what to do and not to do to stay qualified for NCAA."The coach smiled, "Glad to hear it. I've always heard good things about Paul. He'll be a good friend to have when the time comes."All of the guys wanted to hurry.
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