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The girls and I would find a table. One of the girls would get the first round of drinks. I don’t drink so often, but I probably would have a little one. We’d chit-chat for a while, make jokes, poke fun at some of the guys there. At some point, I imagine, a guy would come to our table and ask us to dance with them. He’d be your usually pub guy; blue jeans, short sleeved t-shirt, slightly hairy arms, thick musk. He’d talk to all of us, including me. I’d be shy at first, but after being quite insistent, the girls would get me to join them.We’d be on the dance floor. Nervously, I’d start dancing, but not out of arms reach of the girls. Eventually, the guy will move his way across the dance floor to me. He’d start putting his hand on my waist, and… I won’t stop him. He’d start pressing his body against mine. I’d like it.Eventually, we’d find ourselves moving to the corner of the room, where he’d kiss me. He’d start at my lips and run down my neck. I’d then give in to him.We’d run into the. "Sign here." the man said.A clipboard was waved under my nose along with a pen, bemused I signed at the point indicated and handed back the clipboard. Then I had to leap out of the way as the two men tilted their trolley and wheeled the box and hamper through to the living room. As they took their trolley away I gave them a tip out of sheer habit, the spokesman of the pair thanked me then handed me an envelope that went with the delivery.Alone again I looked at the package, it was covered in labels showing which way up it should be and declaring it 'extremely fragile', which was not a label I'd ever seen before. I looked at the envelope in my hand and frowned; opening it I read the contents in the hope of finding some enlightenment. Instead I grew even more puzzled, the note inside informed me that the contents of the hamper should be laid out for consumption before opening the package. Even more puzzling was the last sentence of the note, 'due to the extreme sensitivity of the.
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