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One Wednesday night I drove up to Ft. Lauderdale. Once there, I used my cell to call a cab company. I asked the dispatcher for the location of a gay bar. Without comment or hesitation she gave me an address. I punched the info into my GPS and drove. I was nervous as hell as I walked into a gay bar for the first time in my life.I waited by the door for my eyes to adjust the dim lighting. I surveyed the room and the patrons. The furnishings were upscale. Nothing cheap here. The men (no women) were, for the most part, upscale as well. Some wore jackets and ties. There were two gorgeous CDs at the bar and a few muscle boys.I found a small table for two in a corner from where I could see the entire room.I ordered a diet soda from cute young guy in short shorts and a white blouse unbuttoned and tied at the midriff.I was looking in the direction of the entrance when a familiar face walked in. It was Jake from my office. Jake, I had learned, was a real ladies man. But here he was in a gay. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you old fart. Now it's my turn."(I love this part) The old farmer smiled and said, "Nah, I give up. You can have the duck."This one is compliments of kilocyclesExcuse meA man enters a hotel lobby. As he runs to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman and as he does, his elbow hits her breast.They are both quite startled. The man turns to her and says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll forgive me."She replies, "If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 243."This one is complements of R LA little boy walks into a whorehouse with a murderous look on his face and a dead frog in his hands and asks, "I want a whore with herpes."The madam looks at the boy and says,"We don't have any of those around here, kid."The boy is not to be deterred, and screams, "I WANT A WHORE WITH HERPES!"The madam decides that it's gonna be easier to just give the boy what he wants and leads him to a room.
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