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I stayed with her all that summer, I chilled out walking by the river next to her land with the dogs, fed the goat and totally relaxed away from the hassle, bustle and bitchiness of the city life I had been used to. I just loved the peace away from the crowds and the city and David.The thing I missed most was that the few local men I met were unbelievably shy of girls, no one my own age dared even speak to me in eight weeks but I enjoyed the chill out after my "relationship" trouble at home. I had lived with David for six months, truthfully the only thing I missed him for was sex, he had been my first and good at it. That's probably why I was still masturbating a lot while thinking about him, even in Wales. I hated myself but did it most nights in bed and sometimes on hot days, in the barn. Once I even played with myself next to a secluded pool down by the river, it excited me so much that I was in the open air doing it that I invented a fantasy that some shy local man was in the. ”They both think for a minute; then the woman says, “I’m an elite poultry farmer.”The accountant asks, “What does poultry farming have to do, with being a prostitute?”“Well, I raised a thousand cocks last year.”Chartered Acct : “Brilliant!! ‘Poultry Farmer’ it is! and Agricultural Income is tax-free.”Twelve of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres ever aired on British TV and radio:1. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - “This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother.”2. New Zealand Rugby Commentator - “Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him.”3. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator - “And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!”4. Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 - “Ah, isn’t that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew.”5. US PGA Commentator - “One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his.
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