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” “All he wants is sex, sex and more sex. My vagina is now the size of a 50 cent piece when it used to be the size of a 5 cent piece.”Her mother says, “You’re married to a multi-millionaire businessman. You live in an 8 bedroom mansion. You drive a $250,000 Ferrari. You get $2,000 a week allowance. You take 6 vacations a year and you want to throw all that away over 45 cents?NOW THAT’S A JEWISH MOTHER!✧ ✧ ✧From dorsetmike‎She says “Why don’t you say you love me anymore?”He replies “I said it once, I’ll let you know if the situation changes.”✧ ✧ ✧This one is from fmwarmac‎So I asked my wife, “Why do you keep buying plants when you just kill them?”She said, “To remind you what I’m capable of.”✧ ✧ ✧Last week I bought a brand new boomerang, even though I can’t seem to get rid of the old one.People who put some money away each week just aren’t shopping hard enough.I bought some fridge magnets. So far, I have 10 fridges.A jellyfish walks into a hardware store and buys ten. I always wanted to fuck her but now she was gone…In 2013,i was in b.Tech final year at an engineering college in lucknow…I got placed in an software company,Then I wanted to enjoy this moment…My friends said that he knows a good call girl…He said,this call girl comes to your place with a mask on her head like marvel’s character cat woman…You will also need to wear a mask like batman to fuck her…People even call her cat women and she fucks only batman… Her cost is also very high…She tries to attract customer through her new style…She moans like cat and does sex like a wild cat…I wanted to fuck this cat women,that’s why I asked my friend to fix my date with her,I got the date that was 2 weeks later…As she was quite famous at that time…Her new disguise as cat women was quite hit at that time in lucknow…Every night she earns nearly 15000 rs…I asked my parent that I m going to join a coaching institute to prepare for government jobs as I don’t want to work in any private software company.
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