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Would you like to help me, Dan?D: Of course! Let's start with the first event from the first Ballbusting Olympics; the long jump. On one side, we have a man standing, naked from the waist down. On the other side, we have a woman who will jump 10 feet, kicking his balls before landing. She gets three kicks to get points before the other team starts. Bringing the man to his knees is rewarded with 5 points and taking him down to all 4s is worth 10. After all 5 of a team's women have their turns, a nurse will inspect the man's testicles to determine extra points.E: We also have my favorite; the carriage race! In this event a man has his penis and testicles tied to a carriage on which a woman will drive. The man is blindfolded, and the woman will be responsible for giving directions. Of course, there are also obstacles which will activate if touched. Depending on the obstacle, the man's testicles will recieve a shock of different strenghts. Some will only surprise the male, but others. “Yes, I am.”...When I woke up from another nap, I felt Jacob stroking the baby hairs on my edges. “What are you smiling about?” I asked as he beamed at me.“The drool on the side of your mouth,” he replied, “and the crinkles around your eyes.”“Ew.”“You asked.” “Next question. What is your New Year's resolution? Or do you hate them with the fire of a thousand suns?”Jacob stretched his legs. “Resolution: spend more time with Honey.”“We see each other every day. And every night.” I jiggled his sack.“Resolution accomplished! Do you have one?”“Flow into the new year with purpose. What that purpose is, I don’t know,” I laughed.“Can I flow with you?”“Of course.” I ran my palm over his carved torso. “I want to move in with you next year. No, wait, I want to move with you next year. No. Next year, you, me, separate places, but in the same direction? Good grief, you’re rubbing off on me.”Jacob placed his fingertip on my nose. “You want to have the ‘What are we doing? Where are we going?’.
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