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) And just like that commercial… the look on her face was priceless. And at that point… was I smart enough to leave it alone. Hell no… I chose to move in for the kill shot… so I continued with, ‘And from where I sit… it’s kinda hard to distinguish between the horse’s ass and your ass. Y’know… they sorta look the same to me.’ (DOUBLE POINTS.) I was on a roll. I was unstoppable. And this material was pure gold. Eventually though, her horse moved out of yelling range so I had to stop. It didn’t matter, I had proven my worth and she was sure to be suitably impressed. Right? It took me almost half an hour to realize that something in our relationship had definitely cooled, but for the life of me I had no idea what it could possibly be. (NOW who’s the dumb animal?) I do remember actually asking her if she was mad at me. That’s when she did this extraordinary thing… she told me she was… and exactly why she was. (I later found out that apparently in the history of the human species, no. ’’With one last kiss I turned and left the bedroom. I could not risk turning back.#The cold night air was a shock on my face. A freezing fog had descended while I was at Laura’s. I did not have a clue where I was so I set the sat nav to take me home. The journey took another hour as the police were in attendance at several accidents where people had driven too fast in the fog. It was after three in the morning when I crept it. I washed quietly in the downstairs cloakroom, hoping I’d done enough to cover the tracks of what I had been doing, but not smelling as fresh as a daisy which would have been equally suspicious. “Are you alright love, you are late?” said my sleepy wife.“It’s a little after two’’ I said deducting and hour and a half from the clock on my side of the bed. “It’s very foggy out there. The police are diverting traffic because of accidents.’’ I thought it was best to keep as close to the truth as possible. “Well I hope it was worthwhile. Did you enjoy it?’’I turned my.
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